Who is therapy for? and is it for me?

If you've clicked on this blog post, it's safe to say that you are asking yourself, "Do I need therapy? And how can it help me?"

First of all, therapy is truly for everyone. In an age where the norms of our life continue to shift and change underneath us, our relationships feel more fragmented from technology and the stress of living, and moving away from our families-of-origin and birth communities is becoming the norm, therapy can give us a space where we are held in the presence of another and remember what it feels like to be grounded in ourselves. This undivided attention, co-regulation, and landing space is invaluable and healing in many ways we do not have language to describe.

Second, there's no shortage of reasons why someone would come to seek out therapy services for themselves. We all sustain wounds in this life. Whether they happened in an instant or over a long period of time, or whether they are large or small - they all deserve attention.

As a clinician, my days run the gambit from talking to people about pregnancy loss and grief, to wondering whether or not it is time to end a relationship that is currently bringing them more suffering than joy, all the way to processing trauma that someone never even realized was impacting their day-to-day functioning. Even if your symptoms aren't severe (or you aren't even sure what your symptoms are) it's likely that talking to someone could be helpful.

Susan Comforting the Baby by Mary Cassatt

Understanding Therapy

To aid in your discernment process of whether or not therapy is right for you, let me first talk about what therapy is meant to be.

Therapy is designed to be a space where you collaborate with a therapist in a nonjudgmental and supportive environment in order to create goals that will help you become more fully yourself. A therapist to someone who has no stake in your personal life, and yet, this does not mean that they do not have the ability to greatly care. It is because of their distance from you in the world around you that they can observe you from a mostly objective space. I say "mostly" because no therapist will ever be able to remove their humanity, their own position in the world, from the chair they sit in (and that's a good thing).

At Being Human Therapy, sessions are conducted for 45 minutes, one-on-one, with your counselor. During your first session, the therapist will go over what is called the informed consent. This includes addressing logistical details such as communication and scheduling, discussing the limits of confidentiality, learning about your therapist's credentials, and setting the tone for the nature of the therapeutic relationship.

The first session is also designed for you and your therapist to be able to suss each other out, to see if you are a good fit for each other. What this means for the therapist is that they assess whether or not your clinical presentation fits their skill set and ability to help. What this means for the client (you) is that you get a sense that this is the kind of person that you would be able to trust enough to open up to.

Research consistently shows that the number one predictor of therapeutic outcomes is the therapeutical alliance, which is a fancy way of saying - if you don't like your therapist, you're probably not going to progress. If that seems comically simplistic to you, you're not alone.

Of course, having someone with the right skills and treatment modalities to help you with your needs matters. But when you're choosing a therapist, you're choosing someone to take a journey with you through some of the most tender moments in your life. You may be with them for a long time! It's important to pick someone that you like.

Theory and treatment modalities - ways that we help

At Being Human Therapy, there are multiple different theories and treatment modalities that we pull from in order to facilitate the healing process. Let's go over a brief description of what some of those theories and modalities are.

• Psychodynamic theory: Psychodynamic theory is the foundation for every other theory we have, as this was developed by Freud himself. The chest of psycho dynamic theory is this: our pass have shaped who we are, we can bring this knowledge to light, and the way that we do this is by exploring childhood patterns and family dynamics. So yes in our sessions you will be asked to tell me about your childhood. Trust me. There's always more there to see than we could ever believe.

  
  

• Narrative therapy: as the name might have you believe, narrative therapy is about the stories that we tell ourselves. When we're using a narrative approach and therapy, we're asking ourselves about the language that we use and that we've heard that is shaped or perception of ourselves in the world around us. We can challenge these words and these narratives to create a new reality in which we can operate as our ourselves more freely.

  
  

• Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) Skills: DBT was developed by a woman named Marsha Linehan who wanted to help people who had severe mood dysregulation. Whether or not this is you, DBT offers many skills for self regulation, communication, skills, and interpersonal effectiveness that can help us live more functionally. DBT is full of all of the emotional and interpersonal knowledge and skills that, frankly, we all should have been able to take an elementary school.

  
  

• Internal Family Systems (IFS): IFS has become increasingly popular therapy over the years, as it takes a wildly different approach to trauma treatment than other modalities that are cognitively focused. IFS theory states that we are all good as humans, and that when we act in ways that go against our values, it is because parts of us need to be healed. IFS believes that we all have within us the goodness to be able to heal and lead these parts of us with compassion, curiosity, courage, clarity, and host of other admirable qualities.

  
  

• Eye Movement Desensitization & Reprocessing Therapy (EMDR): when we experience something traumatic, it means in the wake of whatever event or environment, we were enduring, what we had to process was too overwhelming for a body. This results in memory is being filed away in an active part of our brain, where we do not know that these negative events are over yet. EMDR is a therapy that helps us access these memories with rapid eye movements in order to properly store these memories with the rest of our adaptive memory networks so they do not cause us Payne in the present anymore. If it sounds woo-woo and a bit on the sci-fi side of things, then I'm describing it well. And yet it brings healing the talk therapy alone cannot. If you have more questions about it, feel free to reach out. It's one of my favorite things to nerd out about.

Benefits of Therapy

The benefits of therapy are truly endless when you show up with the desire to change something within yourself. While there are never any guarantees in the therapeutic process, something that I like to tell all of my clients is that if they show up, surely something will shift. Here are some of the practical things that therapy can help with.

• Emotional Support: Therapy provides a safe environment to express feelings without judgment.

• Skill Development: Therapists can teach coping strategies and problem-solving skills.

• Self-Discovery: Therapy encourages self-reflection and personal growth.

• Improved Relationships: Therapy can enhance communication and understanding within relationships.

  
  

Recognizing When to Seek Help

Recognizing when you may need help can be a bit tricky. Here are some signs that therapy could be beneficial:

• Persistent feelings of sadness or anxiety

• Difficulty coping with daily stressors

• Strained relationships with family or friends

• A sense of isolation or loneliness

• Experiencing significant life changes (e.g., loss, divorce, job change)

  
  

If you identify with any of these signs, reaching out to a therapist can be a proactive step toward improving your life.

Practical Tips for Therapy Success

Once you've found a therapist, here are some tips to maximize your therapy experience:

Set Clear Goals

• Discuss your goals with your therapist. Having clear objectives can help guide your sessions and measure progress.

  
  

Be Open and Honest

• Share your thoughts and feelings openly. The more honest you are, the more effective the therapy will be.

  
  

Practice Between Sessions

• Apply what you learn in therapy to your daily life. This can reinforce skills and insights gained during sessions.

  
  

Be Patient

• Change takes time. Be patient with yourself and trust the process.

Conclusion

Navigating life's challenges can be daunting, but therapy offers valuable insights and resources to support you on your journey. By understanding the different types of therapy, recognizing when to seek help, and finding the right therapist, you can take proactive steps toward healing and growth. Remember to incorporate self-care practices into your routine and utilize available resources to enhance your mental well-being.

Take the first step today—reach out for support and embrace the journey toward a healthier, happier you.